I equally never thought this is the place I would be seeking help. I've been accused, not yet arrested, of rape, and I haven't been able to tell anyone apart from one really close mate who wasn't all that helpful - apart from telling me not to panic, what can you do?
A friend - that I'd known for maybe 1 year, or more - came round to my house, she was supposed to be with her boyfriend but he was ill. My partner was away, it was just the two of us. I cooked dinner, we had a fair bit to drink. We were having a super nice evening, listening to music and dancing in a silly, friendly and fun way. There is a connection between us which I feel she knows.
She went up upstairs and was sick. She came out of the bathroom and we kissed - after she'd brushed her teeth - which she responded to (and has admitted was consensual). Here's where the stories differ.
She now claims - ONE YEAR AFTER THE EVENT - that I raped her. In my mind we had full consensual sex, that night and then the following morning. The following morning she said "we shouldn't be doing this, this is the point at which it stops becoming a drunken shag" or something like that, AND SO I STOPPED IMMEDIATELY.
I gave her a towel, she showered, I made her a cup of tea and drove her home.
So, I haven't been arrested, but interviewed under caution. The cops turned up on my doorstep and amazingly my partner wasn't in. In the interest of keeping her and the rest of my family out of it as long as possible I went and gave a statement then and there without a lawyer. But still wasn't arrested, and I'm now in an appalling limbo waiting to hear if there is a case to be brought and I will be charged.
This is highly stressful and upsetting. I feel I cannot talk to anyone about this. My life, and the lives of my elderly parents, my wife (of 1 month!) and everyone else will be deeply, badly affected.
Does anyone, please, have any advice or similar experience? I realise this is a question of consent. I feel she consented in the way that she responded to me and have no memory of her telling me to stop, except for the next morning when as I say I did immediately she asked.
Forum users, do you think there is a case here? Will I be arrested & charges based on what I've just said?
I would really appreciate any thoughts or advice anyone is able to give.