This is the place to report a new allegation

A place to report a new allegation.
jim
Site Admin
Posts: 10
Joined: Mon Apr 14, 2014 9:19 pm

This is the place to report a new allegation

Postby jim » Tue Feb 24, 2015 8:49 pm

If you've been affected by an allegation of rape or a serious sexual offence, this is the place to start your discussion.

shelokay
Posts: 3
Joined: Fri Feb 03, 2017 10:22 pm

Re: This is the place to report a new allegation

Postby shelokay » Fri Feb 03, 2017 10:47 pm

Hi, my story is a little different.

I feel the whole system is affected by those who make false allegations. It makes it all differcult for the victims to.

I am a victim and would like some advice from those who have been falslry accused.

My ex was violent and controling to me. He is now facing charges of coercive control, assualt and rape.
Basically he assaulted me as he thought I had looked at another man, which I hadn't, he then said I had to have sex to prove I still fancied him. I said I didn't want to, but he said I had to and proceeded even though I just lay there crying. I was terrified, and afterwards it lead to me being too scared to say no ever.
Now even though he has a history of violence, even towards his family, his family believe him when he says he is innocent. Social services got involved because of reports of abuse from him to me from the public and my child's school and my family. I nearly lost my child. It was that, that eventually gave me the strength and courage to leave him.
So of course now he is saying I have made the whole thing up as I was about to lose my child and I am saying this to make things look as if I wasn't at fault. Now I have loads of evidence of the control and violence. Also social services reports will show I was a good mum until I met him and their concern was because of him.
What worries me is the rape is my word against his. Although evidence of abuse will show sexual violence was very likely.
I am wondering if those who were innocent, was there other accusations such as violnce? How far did the case go?
I know a lot of rape trials fail because of the lack of evidence, not because the male was innocent.
He had denied everything in his interview, but of course now there is evidence for the violence and control, which shows he is lying about that.
My thoughts, sorry this is a hard anxious time.

Justme
Posts: 2
Joined: Sun Nov 20, 2016 10:13 pm

Re: This is the place to report a new allegation

Postby Justme » Tue Feb 07, 2017 12:16 am

Hello.
First of all I can't imagine the stress and emotions you are going through with your situation and just on that basis you have help if it's ever needed.

I should probably tell you a bit about my sit... Basically I'm still waiting on follow ups from the police regarding there investigation of the accusations made against me(rape and sexual assault) these were made by a person who lead me to a place alone then accused me of these things. Even after she'd admitted to being under the influence of drugs. I spent the night In the cells and had a full forensic test(most horrific thing I've had in my life) and after a night in the cells, they took all my tech which I was told I may have to wait up to 6 months for this to even be referred to court. Ive been kicked out of my house because of it. It's lead to me having to quit my job as I can no longer stay in the area and I've all but fallen apart. I've suffered with severe depression for a number of years and I can honestly say the ownly thing that's stopped me ending it all is I cant do it with people thinking I'm guilty of being a monster. I cry myself to sleep most nights because of it all and what I've lost.

From what I understand when your accused of something it's treated as guilty until proven innocent or lack of evidence and as you've said you seem to have a lot of at least circumstantial on your part.

You sound like an amazingly brave woman to finally stand up to it.

As for the violence parts do you have anyone you confided in at the times or anything as it will also help.

And again I was told I have a 6 month bail but it might be called off 'NFA' (no further action) before then but you just have to wait and bare the weight of it all o it your shoulders.

I genuinely hope yours goes the right way and I hope I've at least helped a bit.

Regards

JUST ME.

John14
Posts: 1
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2017 6:04 pm

Re: This is the place to report a new allegation

Postby John14 » Fri Feb 10, 2017 6:16 pm

Hi, myself and my ex partner had an argument in November 2016 and she had me arrested, While at the police station a CID officer came in and told me I was further arrested for suspicion of rape on my ex, so which I was placed on police bail. After a week of being on bail my ex was constantly phoning my family saying see couldn't cope as we have to children together. She then withdrew all accusations against me so I could go home. This was just before Christmas(20th) 2016. I went home and everything was going great we had the best Christmas and new year, then at the end of January we had a little argument and she told me to leave, so I went to my parents. The next morning the police were knocking my parents door saying hat my ex had made another allegation that I raped her again. My head has been all over the place from this and don't know how to get through it. I hope someone can help with my situation Thanks

shelokay
Posts: 3
Joined: Fri Feb 03, 2017 10:22 pm

Re: This is the place to report a new allegation

Postby shelokay » Mon Mar 20, 2017 7:47 am

Well you are innocent and it's the evidence building and the prosecutor that have to prove the guilt.
Hopefully I will hear a result in a few weeks.

kernel pip
Posts: 11
Joined: Sat Apr 02, 2016 4:11 pm

Re: This is the place to report a new allegation

Postby kernel pip » Tue Jul 18, 2017 3:02 pm

Hi 'shelokay',
from the description of your situation, you are fighting for your life.
Gather all the evidence you can from neighbours, friends ,family,Social Services ( always get their name) etc.Your child needs you to be strong and totally focused.You need all the evidence you can get no matter how small.
Surround yourself with people that will fight for you, do not allow them to drag their feet.
Yes, being falsely and maliciously accused is an horrendous experience, but never allow a guilty person to escape justice.
The court will decide on the EVIDENCE so work hard to collate everything Times,Dates,etc.
If ever you feel threatened do not hesitate to call the police.
Be Strong!

kernel pip

songbird
Posts: 1
Joined: Tue Sep 12, 2017 11:07 am

Re: This is the place to report a new allegation

Postby songbird » Tue Sep 12, 2017 11:17 am

Hi all,

I never thought I'd be turning to this forum for support. I'm a married thirty something woman and three weeks ago I was arrested on historical abuse and breach of trust charges. I've previously worked as a teaching assistant and a student has claimed that when he was 15 we were in a full sexual relationship.

Three people from the child protection team (or something similar) turned up on my doorstep at 8am and arrested me, took me to the police station where i sat in a cell for several hours. I was then interviewed for around 25mins and released. They took my mobile phone which was only returned to me yesterday.

I have to answer bail on Monday and since seeing the lead detective yesterday when he returned my phone I'm just petrified. I don't know what to expect. I had convinced myself (perhaps naively) that I'll attend Monday and the charges will be dropped. But yesterday the DC gave nothing away, just avoided looking at me (or so it felt).

This has just come out of nowhere. Since my arrest I've been treated by the Crisis mental health team.

Looking at different cases online I'm scared this is going to drag out for months. I just wish I knew what to expect. My life has just shattered right now.

It's somewhat reassuring to find others in this position, although I'd never wish it upon anyone.

Dinosaur20
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Sep 19, 2017 10:17 am

Life turned upside down

Postby Dinosaur20 » Tue Sep 19, 2017 10:35 am

Hello,

I equally never thought this is the place I would be seeking help. I've been accused, not yet arrested, of rape, and I haven't been able to tell anyone apart from one really close mate who wasn't all that helpful - apart from telling me not to panic, what can you do?

A friend - that I'd known for maybe 1 year, or more - came round to my house, she was supposed to be with her boyfriend but he was ill. My partner was away, it was just the two of us. I cooked dinner, we had a fair bit to drink. We were having a super nice evening, listening to music and dancing in a silly, friendly and fun way. There is a connection between us which I feel she knows.

She went up upstairs and was sick. She came out of the bathroom and we kissed - after she'd brushed her teeth - which she responded to (and has admitted was consensual). Here's where the stories differ.

She now claims - ONE YEAR AFTER THE EVENT - that I raped her. In my mind we had full consensual sex, that night and then the following morning. The following morning she said "we shouldn't be doing this, this is the point at which it stops becoming a drunken shag" or something like that, AND SO I STOPPED IMMEDIATELY.

I gave her a towel, she showered, I made her a cup of tea and drove her home.

So, I haven't been arrested, but interviewed under caution. The cops turned up on my doorstep and amazingly my partner wasn't in. In the interest of keeping her and the rest of my family out of it as long as possible I went and gave a statement then and there without a lawyer. But still wasn't arrested, and I'm now in an appalling limbo waiting to hear if there is a case to be brought and I will be charged.

This is highly stressful and upsetting. I feel I cannot talk to anyone about this. My life, and the lives of my elderly parents, my wife (of 1 month!) and everyone else will be deeply, badly affected.

Does anyone, please, have any advice or similar experience? I realise this is a question of consent. I feel she consented in the way that she responded to me and have no memory of her telling me to stop, except for the next morning when as I say I did immediately she asked.

Forum users, do you think there is a case here? Will I be arrested & charges based on what I've just said?

I would really appreciate any thoughts or advice anyone is able to give.

Thanks,

Dinosaur20


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